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Preparing My Disclosure

A full or formal disclosure is a prepared, complete account of the behaviors - given on agreed terms, with a trained therapist guiding the process. It heals where piecemeal, drip-fed truth re-wounds, because she receives the whole picture once, supported, instead of fresh betrayals over and over. This sheet is preparation only: the actual disclosure is written and delivered with a disclosure-trained therapist, and the exact process varies by therapist and situation.

This is preparation, not the disclosure itself: The real disclosure is prepared and delivered with a trained therapist. Therapists do this differently, and every situation is different.


Am I ready?

Check what's honestly true right now.

  • [ ] I have meaningful sobriety/stability behind me
  • [ ] I'm doing this for her healing, not just my relief
  • [ ] A therapist is guiding this process
  • [ ] I'm prepared for her to react however she needs to

How ready do I feel right now? (0 = not at all, 10 = ready)

Rate from 0 to 10: ____


My honest motive

Why do I want to disclose now - and whose healing is this for?

______________________________________________

______________________________________________


What complete honesty asks of me

A full disclosure means the whole timeline of behaviors, no minimizing, and no blaming her - and no graphic play-by-play.

What am I most tempted to leave out, soften, or minimize - and why?

______________________________________________

______________________________________________


What I'm afraid of

What am I most afraid of about disclosing?

______________________________________________

______________________________________________


Truth in, detail out

She needs the facts that affect her - what, who, when, and any risk to her. She does not need graphic scenes that only wound.

Notes or questions to take to my therapist about what belongs in and what stays out:

______________________________________________

______________________________________________

Prepared truth makes repair possible: A complete, prepared truth, delivered with support, is what makes repair possible - for her and for you.

Go deeper

Ready for more? These lessons pick up where this worksheet leaves off.

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